Around the world, teenage girls and those of an even younger age are obsessed with the activities of One Direction, the band put together a few years ago who were initially five rejects on the UK version of The X Factor because they weren’t the strongest singers in the competition.
No, we’re not sure how they’ve managed to keep up the façade for so long either, but there is no denying that, by hook or crook, they are one of the biggest things in music today.
Still, those of us who like their music to be a little edgier and less manufactured would have a few suggestions for things that would make them cooler. Here’s a selection of them.
If They Disappeared Forever
We’re not talking about anything severe, like death or anything; splitting up and never being heard from again would be fine with us. At the same time, we’d probably even be okay if one or two of them embarked on a solo career.
As long as they weren’t able to sing any One Direction songs again, we’d allow modest success featuring on a track with Ed Sheeran or some disco number with David Guetta, although you’d have to question whether the latter would be up for it.
If at Least One of Them Learned Guitar
Whatever anyone says, music should never consist of one, two, or 21 people – remember So Solid Crew? – singing to a backing track. If even just one member of One Direction learned guitar, they’d show their current audience that they’re not a bunch of one trick ponies, and perhaps even see attitudes towards them from elsewhere in the musical sphere soften.
This is something we expect to see in a few years’ time, but don’t fool yourself into thinking the extent of the learning will be anything more than a few strings on an acoustic guitar, to be performed at a concert when yes, a backing track continues to play in the background.
If They Were More Rock ‘n’ Roll
Tattoos and sleeping with numerous women are hardly outrageous things to be doing in the 21st century, are they? Okay, we get that almost every element of rock star behavior has been done and seen a million times in the past, but they could at least make an effort.
Rather, it would be nice if their PR machine wasn’t obsessed with keeping up a squeaky-clean image than anyone over the age of 12 surely realizes isn’t representative of the reality? We wouldn’t go out and buy their album just on the basis of a few of them falling out of a taxi a few nights a week and being photographed by a tabloid newspaper, but we’d at least give them some credit.
Look, we don’t mean to look like closet One Direction fans just looking for an excuse to publicize our love for them, but it’d be nice if they weren’t so ‘vanilla’ in everything they do. One Direction should go away and reinvent themselves, and then we might be ready to try again.
Robert is a passionate musician who was inspired to take an online guitar tutorial many years ago, and feels that the members of One Direction would be well served to do the same!