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Fun/Funny, School

5 Things To Remember For The Perfect Kids School Disco

Disco-girls-by-Suzanne-Hansen

School discos should be ace (or whatever it is the kids are saying instead of ‘ace’ these days) and if yours isn’t, you’ll go down in history as the teacher who organized the rubbish disco – even if you’re a veritable Robin Williams of excitement in the classroom!

But with marking, classroom clearing and general end of the year busyness to contend with, the last thing you need to be worrying about is sorting out the end of term disco! So if this wondrous task has fallen to you this year then make sure you follow these five simple tips to make organizing your ‘OMG! Only the best school disco ever, swear down, no lie!’ easy.

1. Hire a DJ

Maybe you’re tempted to put on your best Pat Sharp inspired outfit and get the CD player out. Please don’t! Not only will you lose all credibility until the end of time, you’ll also be very likely to mess things up. No disco needs minutes of dead air whilst the ‘DJ’ scrabbles about putting in the next CD. Hire a professional who will come equipped with not only the music, but lights, bubble machines, smoke machines and plenty more that will add atmosphere and get all the kids dancing for the hilarious amusement of the teachers!

2. Glam Up

To a kid, there’s nothing more exciting than seeing your school hall magically transformed into an out-and-out playground. It may look like a few balloons and streamers to you, but to them it’s Las Vegas! You can kill two birds with one stone by turning your class into a decoration factory during that last week when we all know that no one really does anything. Yes they can all sit down to watch ‘The Little Mermaid’ (not The Little Mermaid again!), but only if they make paper chains, streamers and banners at the same time!

3. Fun Feast

It’s lovely to be able to put on a spread at a school disco but it’s not lovely staying up till four in the morning baking sausage rolls and slicing sandwiches – even if there is a lot of red wine involved. Spend your food budget on DJ’s decorations and about fifteen gallons of squash instead and ask parents to bring some party food along with each kid. You’d be amazed at the ‘loaves and fishes’ effect this has, especially amongst the notoriously competitive Range Rover set!

4. Get Fancy

There’s no better breeding ground for inappropriately dressed children than a school disco, so if you’d like to avoid belly tops and vile T shirt slogans then make your disco fancy dress instead. You can even go Prom style and give your disco a theme. Disney is a great option when you’ve got boys and girls as most kids have at least one or two Disney outfits ready prepared and whether you’re a princess or a robot, it still counts!

5. Don’t be Cool!

This advice is good for school discos and general teaching! Whatever you do, don’t try to go ‘Fonz’ at a school disco (or ever, period). Many teachers have tried to be cool and about 0.1% have actually managed to pull it off. Leave your 1996 rave rags at home and wear something normal. Dance by all means, but enforce an unbreakable ‘no break dancing’ rule for all the staff. A trip to casualty with a broken teacher following a break dancing accident at a school disco (true story) does not set a good example to the little ones!

Patrick Clare knows everything there is to know about hosting successful discos as he is DJ and blogger at Essex Disco, the leading disco specialist in Essex and the South East of England.

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About Dangerous Lee

Writer of essays, short stories and Ask A Black Girl. Author of Keep Your Panties Up and Your Skirt Down & The Half Series - When Black People Look White. Webmaster of DangerousLee.biz.

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